2005 Year in Review

Keep Holiday Stress Under Control

Source: Cammy Sequin, Extension Family Life Educator

It's holiday time again. And if you're wondering how you are going to get everything done, you are not alone. Each year, millions of people suffer from increased stress and tension during the holidays. Why do we feel so much stress?

"One reason is because we exhaust ourselves trying to do too much and what we do isn't very satisfying," says Cammy Sequin, University of Illinois Extension family life educator. "Sometimes we assume that we must do everything that our mothers and grandmothers did. They may have had more time to bake cookies, spend days decorating the house, or hosting dinner parties. But times have changed, and we must make our own changes accordingly."

Families have changed too. They often live further apart and cannot always gather for a holiday. Sometimes jobs or money prevent traveling to a family gathering. And today there are divorces, second marriages, step families, single parent families, and multiple sets of grandparents who want the children to attend their get-togethers. It can get very complicated just trying to get something organized. So, consider creating new traditions that build connections among your family and friends.

"Start by making a plan," suggests Sequin. "List everything that you feel you must do in preparation for a holiday celebration. Remember to include all of the after-holiday tasks such as cleaning up and putting away the decorations."

Take a look at your list. Put a check by all of the things that you really enjoy doing. Next, put a zero by those things that leave you exhausted or unsatisfied. Look at the items that received a zero. Should you continue doing them or eliminate them? Is there something else you could do instead that is more enjoyable and less work? Could someone else do some of the tasks for you?

With these things in mind:
- Know and accept your limitations. This will help you prioritize your obligations and make conscious choices about what you can and cannot do.
- Look for ways to simplify your life. Do you need to prepare a large dinner or just serve a few snacks?
- Be flexible enough to allow for delays and problems that are likely to happen.
- Don't try to live up to the expectations of others or a fantasy family holiday.
- Make a plan that can be accomplished based on the amount of time and energy you have. If things don't work out as planned, make changes for next year.

The holidays don't have to be out of control. They can be a time of connecting with others and enjoyment for all.

by  Editor, theCity1.com
December 13, 2005