2005 Year in Review

Strong Families Tend to Have Shared Qualities

Source: Patti Faughn, Extension Educator, Family Life, (217) 782-6515

The census data reports more variety in the make-up of families than ever before. Regardless of how a family is defined, research shows that people in families are healthier, both mentally and physically, than people not in families.

Families with healthy relationships are especially beneficial. Families identified as being strong tend to have some of the following qualities that pull the members together and keep them working as a team especially when things are difficult, according to Patti Faughn, University of Illinois Extension educator, family life.

- Active maintenance of a positive, healthy marriage or relationship (when applicable)
- Shared views on childrearing, financial goals, and financial management
- Caring, supportive expressions of love in both words and actions
- Family rules that are agreed upon by family members
- Being together in both work (chores) and play (planned), instead of only leftover time
- Family time that gives each a sense of belonging
- Communication (learning to listen, ask questions, pay attention to nonverbal messages and work toward understanding) and collaborative solutions to conflicts
- Flexibility and acceptance of change
- Making ordinary routines, like meals and bedtime, into shared priorities
- Spirituality as a guiding force that bonds the family together
- Shared responsibilities
- An interest and concern for the happiness of others
- Humor as a way to relieve tension and bring closeness
- Respect for each other’s privacy and belongings
- Allowing a difference of opinions or interests
- Taking time to care for and re-energize own needs

During National Family Week, Nov. 20-26, families can consider how they can build relationships within the family. Look at the activities you are involved in, suggested Faughn. Are they necessary? Do they pull you together as a family or push you further apart? Do you rush through your day without really connecting with others? Is your family getting the time and attention they need?

“Identify, define, and celebrate the strengths that you see in your family,” Faughn said. “No matter what stage of life your family is in, it’s never too late to strengthen your family relationships. Just take it slow and easy, and don’t expect change overnight.”

by  Editor, theCity1.com
November 7, 2005